Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
