I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
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