Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
not ubering you a puppy
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
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