break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
