It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Randomize
