i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
