He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize