I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
