dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Dude I just picked up a married chick while her husband was playing pool.
What do you mean you picked her up? How are you gonna leave the bar?
I didn't. I fucked her in the men's room. Come get me before he finds out.
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Randomize