dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize