I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
