the new term for farting is butt boxing.
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
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