You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Randomize
