Define "chronic" masturbator.
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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