So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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