All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I am naked and annoyed.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
Randomize
