It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Randomize
