We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
is that a dick in a sweater?
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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