Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
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