Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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