I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
