question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
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