$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
