Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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