No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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