I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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