So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
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