Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Randomize
