why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
