This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
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