Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
