I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Randomize
