i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
It's blow job season.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
That accounts for only three of the penises
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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