420 ftw
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Randomize
