U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Randomize