K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Holy shit dude........stairs
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