I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
