i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
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