He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Randomize