love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
Randomize
