WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Randomize
