did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
NoShamevember. You game?
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
