the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
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