on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
