she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize