Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Randomize
