Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
