Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Randomize
