I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Randomize
