why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
