Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
Randomize
